6-9 Month Baby Sleep Guide
If your baby is in the 6-9 month age range one of two things is happening:
Things are getting dramatically better!
Your baby is taking longer more predictable naps, you’re down to 0-1 feedings at night, you’re no longer wearing flannel PJ pants to the grocery, and you’re reading enough to show your face at your monthly book club meetings. WOO HOO!
Things are bad or possibly getting even worse!
Your baby is taking short unpredictable naps, bedtime is a dreaded chore, and you’re up so often at night you wish you could go back to the newborn phase because that was easier. (If so keep reading!)
You’re probably done swaddling your bigger baby but some older babies still need to be swaddled although I promise you you’re very close to being done with wrapping up your baby Houdini. You’ll want to continue to use loud white noise and work hard to make sure you aren’t keeping baby awake too long. Your 6-9 month old baby is hopefully taking somewhat longer and more regular naps (check out Baby Sleep What is Normal for more details on this). Most babies at this age are napping ~3 times a day. The first 2 naps are serious where the 3rd nap (which falls in the late afternoon/early evening) is generally more of a cat nap.
Teaching Your Baby to Fall Asleep
You can no longer nurse, rock, pat, etc your older baby to sleep. If your 6-9 month old baby is sleeping poorly THIS is the problem. It’s not the teething, growth spurts, wonder weeks, learning to roll over, or any of those other changes that make parenting an older baby so exciting. The problem is that they haven’t yet learned how to fall asleep on their own.
The process of gradually reducing the amount of nursing, rocking, and butt patting you do can be frustrating. But it’s REALLY important. Also? Failure to do so almost guarantees you will never ever sleep through the night. That’s how important it is.
I know it’s not easy but trust me, the longer you wait to deal with this issue the more likely it is that you’re headed towards cry it outsville. I’m not saying you can’t avoid this path, but as your baby get’s older, it get’s harder to do so. So really, now IS the time.
Further Reading
How and Why to Use and Loose the Paci
Weaning Baby OFF the Swing
When Night Weaning isn’t Working
Bedtime What Time?
Why Your Baby Hates the Crib
What to Do About Short Naps
Are You Keeping Baby Awake Too Long?
Sleeping Through the Night Part 1
Sleeping Through the Night Part 2
What You Need to Know About Sleeping Through the Night – Part 3
And of course the ever popular – Baby Sleep What is Normal?
Kristin on 
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Hi, I was wondering if you could tell me why my 6 month old girl can put herself to sleep by herself without any tears or problems when she goes to bed and sometimes will through the night but 2/3 times a night needs feeding/rocking back to sleep and will cry as soon as she is put down? She is bf but has one bottle of ff when she goes to bed at 7pm. Up until 4 months she was sleeping 10 hours. She also is a terrible napper, very rarely puts herself to sleep and has 4 x 30 minute naps. Any help would be very much appreciated
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE we need help with our 7 month old daughter. Her naps have fallen apart to the point that she now sleeps no longer than 30-60 minutes in a day. At three months we managed to successfully wean her off nursing to sleep and lately it seems she is trying to reintroduce it. Strangely not even that calms her anymore. She is so sleep deprived and exhausted, and we are extremely worried about her. When it’s clear she simply CANNOT sleep without help I nap with her, or attempt to, which usually just results in her pulling her hair, scratching her ears until they bleed, kicking me repeatedly, scratching my face, crying with frustration…. she doesn’t have an ear infection, and if she’s teething she has been doing so for months… We are at our wits end. No amount of soothing helps her to settle down but as her parents we KNOW she is overtired and it is getting serious. We have totally run out of options and I feel like a major failure. Does anyone have ANY idea what is going on?! ;(
Hi Kirsten,
poor you! I really feel for you. I too have been battling my daughters lack of sleep, both at night and during the day. She is 6 months, and a very inquisitive, alert baby, but it means that she prefers to be awake than asleep! Listen, I am only a few steps ahead of you on the path to glorious sleep, but when this happened to us a little while ago, I did whatever I could to get her to sleep. The stroller normally works (I would go out 2-3 times a day, rain or shine), the car at times (though I think this is a dangerous one to get her used to as you could be creating a rod for your back), my trusty Beco carrier (the only one she likes) to walk around, outside if the weather permitted but it also works in the house, nursing her to sleep (she particularly liked this at about 5pm for a half hour cat nap). I also bought things to extend the naps, so a black-out drape to put over the stroller (its called Snooze Shade and its designed for cutting out the light in strollers) and also something called Robopax, which is a flat stroller- rocker thing – you put the stroller or car seat on it and continues to mimic the motion. Good when you want to come home but keep them sleeping and dont want to lift them out of the seat. I also got a white noise cuddly sheep, which makes tidal sounds (and which sounds similar to my own shushing). I also tried lying down with her on my bed whilst nursing her (which didnt really work, to be honest, but it felt nice!). Have you tried giving her a massage? That does help now and then – just smooth some olive oil on her and do some gentle strokes, I reckon you can find some advice on strokes on the internet. I assume you have checked out any medical reasons she could have ie colds, teething etc? Have you also tried feeding her more during the day? Doing all this does make you feel as if all you are doing is either feeding her or trying to get her to sleep, but I think the concerted effort did help her body get reconditioned to sleeping again. It is still hard as she refuses to take her midday nap anywhere other than in her stroller (though she does do swimming in the mornings, and that tires her so much I am able to put her into the cot for a nap – a miracle!!) Once I was able to get her up to 2 hours a day (which took me about 1-2 weeks) I started with the sleep training all over again. Phew. Good luck, my thoughts are with you.
I love this site, BTW. Its amazing that Alexis devotes so much time and energy to it. Thank you!
Ah thanks Zuzu for all your advice!! Unfortunately I have tried all of these things
I massage her legs while nursing her if she seems hyper. She doesn’t sleep in the car, or in the stroller. I used to wear her all day long in a baby carrier until my back started hurting and it stopped being effective. She is a pretty large baby (95th percentile.) and not the easiest to carry around!! We use white noise, we have solid routines, and she “sleeps” in the swing during the day, cot at night. She had a very strong nurse to sleep association so I can’t lie down with her anymore for any naps because she then expects it every time and it is not sustainable. Plus, these days she just ends up hanging out on my boobs but not sleeping.
Over the past few days we decided to take the bull by the horns and just CIO for naps. I think when a baby is resisting all forms of comfort, and is tearing her own hair out from exhaustion you just have to do what you can and insist on sleep. Luckily after a day it was a success and now she is slowly starting to sleep longer… Long may it last!! Of course, now she is waking up all night instead. AGH!!!!!!! At some point I will get some sleep :/
Hi Kirsten
I have just been reading through your post and I can identify completely with what you have gone through. It seems things have settled for you now? My baby at 6 months went through the exact same problems with pulling and scratching at her ears (one more than the other) until it bled. I eventually figured it might be some eczema. I decided to use a mild hydrocortisone cream which helped a little. I brought her to the doc who said I was doing exactly the right thing but if the milder version didn’t work to use a stronger one SPARINGLY the odd time and it worked immediately!!! Massive change with her. In case your little one starts this problem again it’s good for you to know. I have had eczema and I know how uncomfortable the itching can be. These creams are the only thing that work during a flare up. In between times keep her skin (backs of her knees too) well moisturized. Good luck
Hey Alexis,
My 5 month old will only fall asleep while breastfeeding. He will rearely sleep if i am just sitting down with him or rocking him and will NEVER fall aseep without me holding him. Would it be okay for me to put him to sleep in his crib with a bottle of warm water? Would it help at all? I sure don’t want to have a kicking screaming 2 year old when i won’t breastfeed him to sleep everynight anymore. Is it necessary to have him sleep on his own now? Is it possible? Since the day he was born, even in the hospital, he has slept in bed with me. Around three months old I started putting him to sleep (on the breast as always) and then putting him in the crib. This is when he started to sleep through the night again. But recently, he has been waking up 2 hours after i put him in the crib and wants me to change him, and put him back to sleep. Sometimes he will wake up again 2 hours later and sleep through the night once i put him back to sleep or he’ll just wake up the first time and sleep through the night. Sometimes he will wake up later in the night while im sleeping and ill just bring him into bed with me, which will be followed by him waking up throughout the night and having to continuously be nursed back to sleep. I’m really not sure how to get him to go to sleep on his own especially considering i live with his grandparents and his 14 year old aunt and i don’t want to keep them up with a screaming baby. Would it be worse to just have him sleep on his own at one or two years old?
Hi Alexis,
I am struggling big time to get my almost six month old, ebf son to sleep for naps. At night, we did CIO about a month ago and he now sleeps on his own every single night with no tears. I place him awake in the crib and he falls asleep within a few minutes. He sleeps ttn from about 7:45 until sometime between 4 and 6. When he wakes up, he nurses, then goes to sleep for about two more hours. Sounds great, no? The problem is that he will not self soothe for a nap like he does at night. He has a total sleep-nursing association. He falls asleep on the boob, but when I pop him off, he wakes up and cries. If I am able to pop him off without crying, he wakes up when I put him down in the crib and screams. I have let him cry (to see what happens) and he can cry for over 20 minutes without falling asleep. I use blackout shades, white noise but no more swaddle because he breaks out of it. Any ideas/suggestions? Naptime has become a major source of anxiety for me and I dread putting him down to sleep. I’ve read the advice on how to wean from a paci, but am not sure how to apply it in this situation.
Thanks in advance!
Diana, I am having the exact same issue with my 7 month old… sleeps well at night with minimal wake-ups after we sleep-trained her, but naps are still extremely short and it is almost impossible to get her to settle without a bottle (and then usually what happens is that she falls asleep with it, and either wakes as soon as we put her in her crib, or wakes about 15-20 minutes later and nap is done). I suspect we may headed towards crying-it-out at nap-time, but I am not really sure how to accomplish this. My understanding is that CIO works so well at night that they are so tired that eventually they have no choice but to fall asleep on their own, but that this is not the case during day sleep. So I am not really sure how to accomplish sleep-training her for naps (although if I have learned anything from Alexis, I think the first step would be to break the bottle-nap association!) I would appreciate any insights that any others may have as well!
As of about two weeks ago, I’ve had a napping breakthrough
Instead of nursing right before attempting a nap, I started putting my baby down for a nap about two hours after the start of the last feeding. Works like a charm. I used to be afraid to nap him without feeding him, thinking that he would be hungry, so I’d start a feeding and then he’d fall asleep. I was never able to transfer him to his crib without him waking up. Now, 9 times out of 10, I put him in his sleep sack, and rock him for a little while in his dark room with white noise going, and he falls asleep for a decent nap. I am now doing eat, play, sleep for his routine. Try to put your baby down at the same times every day, or about two hours after she last woke up. It’s working for me!
Great suggestion. Does she root for the boob when your are rocking her though? I can’t seem to rock my little guy without that happening, when I don’t give in, then he cries. When you put her down in the crib is she sleeping or awake- if awake, does she cry?
Also, to confirm you put her down 2 hours after she woke up or 2 hours after you last fed her? Thank you again for your suggestion, I am hoping it will work with my little one.
Great idea, I am inspired and will try it starting tomorrow! Thanks!
I’m at wits end. My 6 month old is a TERRIBLE napper. We have his bedtime routine down to a T and he sleeps from 7pm-4:30am. He wakes because he’s wet so we change him, feed him and ALWAYS lay him in his crib awake. He sleeps until 7am. Then we get him up and do our normal daily routine. Naps are an entirely different story. I do the same routine with him every time. I breastfeed him, rock him for 5 minutes, lay him in his crib awake but sleepy and give him his kisses and leave the room. He wakes 20 minutes later EVERY TIME! And will not go back to sleep. We have tried CIO and he will literally cry for the next 40 minutes straight. I have did the whole pick him up, cuddle him, soothe him and lay him back down…he still cries. I soothe him in his crib…still cries. He has a radio in his room playing all the time around the clock. He just hates napping. He has been like this since he was born. We even switched from 3 naps to 2 as was suggested… still nothing. I cry as much as he does. I can’t stand to hear him cry. It’s now been Day 7 of trying the CIO consistently for naps and he still is no better than Day 1. I’ve tried putting him down earlier, later, etc. Still nothing. I think each baby is different. I’m getting so stressed and frustrated especially reading when ppl have their babies sleep an hour – 2 hours at a time. It makes me feel like a failure. When I know I’m not. As long as they are loved, dry bum, fed, cuddled, and happy I don’t think there’s any more you can do for them. As of today, I’m just going to let him get up after his 20 mins, and hope he naps longer the next nap. Oh and I have tried stirring him to get a new sleep cycle to start…still doesn’t work.
Hi Alexis,
I love your site and have been using this since my baby was born. She is 8.5 months now and we started the CIO method at month 6 but due to illness, travel etc, she kept regressing back to her old ways. We are doing it again now and it is generally going ok – except
A) she always cries for 10-20 mins when going to bed – will there ever be a time where the crying completely goes away?
B) she wakes up at 2:30am crying. I have started giving her just water to night wean her. I know she is not hungry coz she drinks just an ounce before pushing the bottle out. She then plays/complains/whimpers till 4am and finally falls asleep when I go into check on her around that time. I end up rubbing her back for a minute or two coz I am not sure how long I should let her stay up past 4am and I don’t want to be sleep deprived.
She doesn’t cry much during this time. I am not sure what’s going on and how to fix this- should I just let her stay up till she finally cries enough or figures out to sleep on her own?
Hi all … idk where to start
it wont be wrong if i say we havent slept in months (surprisingly we got 2 weeks or so with 4-6 stretches of night sleep since i started to ST (PUPD)my lil bundle of joy -(5.5 months then and now 6 months)
We started initially with a completely OT baby getting up every hour or two and then till last week we came down to 6hrs of straight sleep with 1-2NW – 1 for 5min and the other for feeding ..He would go down in an hour or to the max 2hrs. We were really enjoying this new routine where we all were sleeping and happy, but suddenly i have no idea what happened … since last 4 days its getting worse and worse …last night he was getting up every hour and tonight i put em down at 6:30pm and since then hes getting up crying every 5-10-15 minutes.
Today i thought may be i should start nap training and so i did …naps have been going crazzy lately, wondered if thats leading to NW+ OT … hes been taking two 30 min naps and one 40-50 min nap since a week now, Today took two 30min naps and i was so disheartened and felt exhausted and lost .. no matter i started an Early BT my lil angel took an hour and a half to finally sleep (felt like he forgot ST which ive been doing more than 15 days now)
i feel like quitting all nap/sleep training and just taking things how they are (either ways its not helping me or my baby)
Please please please help me… i just dont know what more to do ..
I thought I was alone until I seen all these story. My 7 month old will put herself to sleep for her naps which are only 20-30 min if I’m lucky! Bed time I nurse her to sleep she’ll sleep until for a 2-3 hours then she’s waking up I really don’t know what else to do I let her cio and it really did help the first night she sleep 6 hours by the 3 night she was sleeping 9 hours then she got sick and now the cio is just a thing in the past please any advice will help!!
Hi,
Iv come across your page and I’m ever so grateful for your info, my baby is 6.5 months and never been a good sleeper but got worse around the 4 month Mark, I have followed your steps by feeding him 20 minutes before bed and just putting him down in his cot awake. we have done this for naps for a week and have managed for 2 nights with maybe 2 minutes of crying/fussing, my big question is when do you think I can start cutting his nighttime feeds as I cannot cope with the 3-4 night feeds any longer!! he doesn’t have a pacifier!
This is my second child but my first slept through from 6 weeks….so this is all new to me!
Thanks Claire
My daughter has just turned 8 months. She is a great napper. She was taking 3 naps until now but she has started resisting the 3rd nap. What happens now is that I put her down for the night at about 7 or 7:30 and she wakes up after an hour or so and thinks she is waking up from a nap. She refuses to go back to sleep and thus she is staying awake until 10 or 11 pm. Also she can get a little moody during this time. CIO is not an option for me because she will vomit if she gets worked up. Any suggestions? Or is this normal?
maybe try an extended night time bedtime routine and a dreamfeed before she usually wakes up?? just a thought
I’m at a loss with my 7 month old. Her naps are textbook (morning, afternoon and catnap in the evening.) She falls asleep on her own. I need only put her in her crib, day or night, and she puts herself to sleep. It’s her nights that are driving me nuts. She typically sleeps from 7 to 1 am. After that, it’s downhill with her waking every 1-2 hours until 6:30. She is hungry for some of those wakings and so we’re not ready to nightwean her but would like to get us down to just 2 night wakings. We’ve tried everything (CIO and no cry solutions). Nothing works and I don’t understand why, after 1 am, she can’t stay asleep. Any suggestions?
Hi Alexis!
I have a 7 month old who sleeps great for our sitter (3 hr naps, 5 days a week) but won’t nap for more than 45 minutes when he is at home on the weekends. He sleeps well at night although in my new-mom-I-have-no-idea-what-I’m-doing-and-just-need-a-nap stage, I resorted to feeding to slep. So when he wakes up during the night, usually no more than once, I have to get up and nurse him back to sleep (sometimes hubby helps out with the bottle and sometimes, like magic, the baby sleeps ALL THE WAY THROUGH THE NIGHT! HALLELUJAH!). But feeding to sleep doesn’t seem to help for nap time. He usually falls asleep when I feed him but the minute I put him in his crib you would think he was in mortal danger!
I guess I have two qestions: 1) How in the world can I get this child to nap for even an hour or two and 2) How do I break the feed-to-sleep routine I have gotten myself into without the pain of sleepless nights. I can’t imagine willingly going through that again.
Any help you can give would be awesome. I realyl look forward to the weekends but with a great dread of how bad the nap situation will be.
That is not only a load of crap, it is downright harmful misinformation. Really? If you don’t stop snuggling/nursing/bouncing/rocking your 6-9 month old to sleep you’ll never sleep again? Wow. I always nurse and bounce my 7 month old daughter to sleep and she sleeps 12 hour nights with 3 1 hour naps during the day. I know plenty of parents here in Portland, OR who did all of the wonderful security enforcing things you’re advocating against, and guess what?? Their teenagers aren’t asking to be rocked to sleep. Shocking, I know. Please consider that lack of human contact is unnatural, especially at night time. One reason so many Americans are so depressed. A better solution is practicing good sleep hygiene – an hour of calm down time before bed that includes things like massage, a warm bath, chamomile tea for mom, soft music, reading a book, and having total darkness in the sleeping room. Not using the bed or bedroom for anything but sleep. These are good sleep habits for babies and adults alike. Whatever you do, DON’T stop comforting your baby. The nights are long but the years are short, and soon you’ll be longing to hold that little baby in your arms again. Think about it.
Another note, babies are biologically designed to process breast milk quickly and need to eat frequently – not sleep through the night. My daughter nurses 3-4 times during her 12 hour stretch and neither of us has to actually wake up. Their brain grows the most in your entire life in the first 2 years. It’s not biologically appropriate to expect a baby to sleep through the night. And if you cosleep and breastfeed, it doesn’t have to sacrifice anyone’s needs.
Hello! Question about babies who just learned how to roll from back to tummy: my little guy is up every hour at night crying and when I go to him, I find him on his tummy very upset. I know he knows how to get back, but he doesn’t seem to remember that skill in the middle of the night. Is this something one just has to ride out and wait until babe has mastered this new skill or is this a CIO kind of thing? I feel bad letting him cry, because he’s so upset when he gets stuck. What is your advice?
Thanks!!
My little girl (6mos) is having the same problem. It really freaks her out, and she can’t figure out to just lay her head down to the side. And as fast as I turn her on her back, she’s back on her belly. Also, she constantly has her hands in her mouth, which she usually gags on. I always swaddled her, but now she rolls over while swaddled, so I felt like it was time to give up swaddling. Any advice would be wonderful.
This happened with my 6 month old…5 months at the time. He eventually got the hang of it. He would wake in the middle of the night on his tummy and cry and cry. I’d flip him back and half an hour later he’d cry again. I flipped him back onto his back about 4 times the first night and then gave up. I let him cry himself to sleep which only took 5 minutes and over 3 more nights of him realizing I wasn’t coming back in to flip him over…he got it. That was 3 weeks ago and we haven’t had any issues since. I do not swaddle any more though. Only give him a very lite flannel blanket and only put it up to his belly button. I just turned the heat up a little more so he won’t get too cool. And make sure he has a sleeper on with socks or the sleepers with toes.
Please help! I read your article about 2 months ago and it was working pretty well until about 2 weeks ago. My daughter is almost 9 months and at 7 months 1 week, we decided to let her CIO after reading your article. She had been nursing all night in order to fall asleep so I was slowly trying to night wean her as well. At first, after putting her to bed around 8-8:30, she would wake up for the first time around 1-2, then again around 5 and then around 7:30-8. That worked itself to dropping the 1-2 am waking and even one night to a solid night of sleep! But, in the past several weeks, I have done everything the same and she is waking between 12-1, 3, 5, and then 7. Also, it typically goes straight to a full scream instead of whining first then gradually getting louder. The past 3-4 days have been especially challenging bc she has now learned to pull herself up on her crib and gets very angry/unable to self soothe. I have resorted to putting her in bed with me the last few nights and that doesn’t work as well as it used to. When left to let her CIO it is now taking close to an hour for her to cry herself to sleep, which it used to take about 5-10 min max. Please help!
Also, I have a Baby Bjorn travel crib that is used when we visit family that she will not sleep in (screams violently). It is hers and so the sheets/blankets etc are all familiar. Any advice on this issue? It had made it almost impossible to visit family. Thanks!
Hello and good morning.
We had to camp out in CIOville for a few nights and while it was horrible, our 6 month old now sleeps 10-11 hours at a stretch. The only time he wakes in the night is when he rolls over and can’t quite get back again. Poor bug.
Anyhow, I can now put him in his crib for naps with minimal crying (5-10 minutes). BUT I have been finding that he is not sleeping–just playing! Sometimes he prattles away. But this morning he is just enjoying the feel of the fabric of his blanket and the breathable bumpers on his crib. He has no toys in the crib; just his little “lovie” blanket. I assume I should just roll with this; he isn’t screaming or even fussing. Just chillin’. The issue is after 20-30 minutes, then he will start to scream–quite often this is case. Shall I just continue with our CIO method that worked? I hate to go back to it; but teaching him to sleep seems invaluable. Thanks.
Sarah,
I know you asked a question to Alexis about CIO, but I found your post inspiring. I was hoping you could help. My son has a strong association to nursing to help him calm down to be able to sleep. I put him down awake at night and he can settle. However, last night I tried to separate nursing by 20 minutes in his bedtime routine before I put him down awake. He was besides himself. He cried for over an hour, screamed really to the point I had to go in because he woke my 3 year old up- who has night terrors and he desperately needs his sleep.
Anyway, it all backfired on me. I went in to feed him and then put him down awake after the hour + of crying. It seemed that nursing for a few minutes did the trick. When I put him down, he was out for the count at 8 p.m. HOORAY, right? NO… he was then up every HOUR on the hour starting at midnight.
Needless to say, I am just at my wits end. I cannot function and need help. When you were camping in CIOville, after you put baby down awake, how many feedings did you do during the night? I am in a tug a war kinda battle with myself, thinking I should follow Dr. W’s path… put baby down nursing but don’t go in until 11, only 2 feeds and then not go in until 6 {which is easier on my little guy and he doesn’t cry for hours initially but horrible during the night} OR work on what this blog is saying, distance nursing from bed and night feed when needed, then try to wean when bed awake is established.
Any words of advice or wisdom? My baby is 7 months old tomorrow. Oh and he has white noise, swaddle, lovey and in crib. He is a BIG boy and no longer works in the swing. Thanks.
Sorry one last thing. My little guy can fall asleep during the day in the car without nursing before putting him in to the seat. That shows me that he can sleep without nursing BUT needs motion. I hate to go to the swing when he does fine in the crib with nursing. OH GOOD LORD, I feel like a crazy woman.
Hi, Joanne!
I am so sorry you are having troubles! It’s hard, I know. I am a first-time momma, so I am certainly no expert. BUT I did email pretty much every mother on facebook friends list and almost all of them told me that they had to let their kiddo CIO so that they could learn to sleep on their own. My little guy is sooo stubborn (he gets it from me and my husband, poor guy!). I thought that we rounded the CIO corner last week but then he started regressing. He would cry for an hour and still not sleep. I called the pediatrician and she said to let him go a bit longer (with checks, of course). He cried for 80 minutes and fell asleep. It was horrible and I felt like a neglectful mother.But for us I think it was a battle of the wills. BUT that night, we switched his bottle with his bath so that he was not feeding to sleep and he cried 10 minutes and passed out. the next night about 10 minutes and slept and last night he cried about 5. For naps, I give him his bottle and he usually falls asleep. I wake him just a little and pop him int he crib. Naps now (knock wood) are lasting about 1.5 hours or a little less. So all of that to say: Be consistent and be strong. I do not have another kiddo to worry about; I can see how that makes it a lot harder. For us, managing naps first really helped because then our sleep was less disrupted and that makes life better for everyone. He also has never taken a paci so he really needed to learn to self soothe. So maybe try to manage naps first (I know Alexis said that nighttime is the first thing to address) but maybe our backwards approach will work for you?
I hope this rambling helps! I am praying you and yours all get some rest!
Thank you so much for the reassurance and helping me to realize that I can help my son learn how to sleep. I tried CIO again tonight- books and cuddling being the last thing we did and your prayers must have been heard because he fell asleep after 5 minutes of fussing! So thank you. I will have to pick your brain when I start to night wean. Thanks again.
I’m not sure if this comment has already been posted by some one else, so I’m sorry if this is a repeat. I’m so baffled by my 8 month old. Lately (and I’m talking about the last 2 or so weeks) his naps have been becoming shorter and shorter. He seems to nap about a half hour to 40 minutes during the day.
I thought, perhaps, I wasn’t keeping him up long enough. He’d start to show the “I’m sleepy” signs (rubbing eyes, yawning, getting increasingly fussy) about 2 hours of awake time, so down I’d put him for a nap (I do put him to sleep awake, we’ve been doing that since about 5 months and it’s going well). Half hour to 40 minutes later, he wakes. Sometimes happy, cooing, babbling, etc. Sometimes fussy. So the week before last, I thought “well, maybe he needs to be awake a bit longer before napping” and I’ve widened that awake window to 2 & 1/2 to 3 hours. Sometimes he naps more than an hour. Mostly not. Mostly he’s between that half hour to 40 minute range.
What’s the deal? What could I be doing wrong? What ELSE could I try to help him nap longer? He doesn’t do this at night. He’s not a fantastic, sleep through the night kind of fellow yet (though last night he did randomly bless us with 10 hours of uninterrupted sleep – however, most night’s it’s 3.5-4 hours at a time…).
Any suggestions? Any tips?
Not sure this is any help, but my little one used to have short naps… 30-45 min, and all of a sudden he started taking longer ones again! Perhaps just a phase? My guy is 8months, and his naps are 1hour-2.5 typically, and twice a day. They used to be 2 naps for shorter, he just changed all of a sudden. Maybe it will pass!
i’d love to hear about this too as i am in the same pickle!! my girl is almost 8 months and suddenly is taking 30-40 minute naps, and the middle of the day nap is getting almost impossible. she falls asleep for 10 minutes, then is WIDE awake and chipper, and i try again 1/2 hour later. if i let her cry, one day it was 1 hour and then next 30 minutes and she took long naps but then her 3rd was short too. i tried extending the window and that didn’t work either. i am also hoping it’s a growth spurt that she will grow out of. she also got less hungry at the same time so maybe??
Okay, so I don’t know if this will help you or not, but he is finally sleeping great naps. I can count on at least 1 hour & 20 minutes for each of his two naps now. By the end of March, this weird nap thing went away. I honestly think the culprit was teething. He finally cut his bottom two middle teeth – ones those bad boys were through the surface, he started taking amazing naps.
hopefully your little one gets her schedule back on track soon! It’s so frustrating when you know your babe needs the rest but just won’t take it.
thank you Sarah! she’s got a cold now so it could be stuffy nose combined with those teeth coming in!!
I’m soooo glad!!! Did you feel like you conquered the world after he fell asleep?! I always do! We had a bit of a roller coaster last night: E went right down; no fussing. But had a soaked diaper around 11:45pm. My husband changed him in the crib (that’s a new trick that usually helps!) and baby boy was not having it. So he screamed for about 12 minutes and then conked out and slept until his usual 5am bottle. He has been drooling like crazy; I think we’ve got some more teeth! I will keep you in my prayers!
Hey Alexis,
I’ve literally read every post on your site and can’t figure out why my LO is such a poor sleeper, STILL. He is almost 7 months old, and is super inconsistent. One night he will only wake up twice, and the next night he will be up 8 times. He falls asleep on his own no problem. I’ve sleep trained him. I’ve tried ignoring his cries unless I think he is hungry. It didn’t work. He is breast fed and I’ve upped his solids to 3x a day. He naps 2-3 times a day (I have nap trained him as well). I’m at a total loss… I have no idea what to do next. Please help!!
Hi everyone! My 8 month old knows how to put himself to sleep, he has done it a lot since he was a few months old. He gets up a lot at night to eat… 3-6 times (another issue in itself – I am exploring the idea of night weaning, once we are settled in our new home in about a month). At bedtime, he fights going to sleep, and cries and I pick him up to comfort him, but sometimes (most often) it is a battle…is there anything I can do to improve that? We have a nighttime routine. I get him ready the second I see any sign of sleepiness. I am not super keen on CIO, but would that work because he does know how to fall asleep? He sometimes accepts the snuggles, sometimes isn’t happy no matter what you do. Just dislikes the day being over? Would love some advice, or comments! Thanks!
Tooth #2 is making its way up soon too! Maybe he feels the pain of teething more when he is trying to go to sleep?
My 7 month old seems to be getting worse with nighttime sleep! I have done everything- we weaned him from the swaddle into the majic sleep suit and he is now weaned from that, we stopped giving him his pacifier at night(and this helped dramatically up until the last couple weeks), he falls asleep on his own at both bedtime and nap times, we have a set bedtime routine that we follow every night and he goes in his crib awake and falls asleep on his own. The problem is that when he wakes up in the MOTN he won’t fall back asleep on his own usually unless I nurse him. A month ago, I tried night weaning by gradually reducing the amount of time he was nursing and after a couple days (and lots of crying) he slept from 7-5, then nursed and went back to sleep for an hour or two, for 2 nights in a row. After that, he would sleep until about 4-430 am and I nursed him then because I figured it was close enough to 5 am and wasn’t worth making him CIO for an hour. And then it started be 3:30 or 3. And now within the last couple weeks, he has woken up as early as 11:30! If he wakes up really early then he will wake up again about 2-3 hours later for another MOTN feeding, so now sometimes he is getting 2 MOTN feedings. At one point I decided that if he woke up any earlier than 4 am, I just wouldn’t feed him and let him CIO if he had to. Well he cried for 2 hours straight one night and 1.5 hours another night. He is also teething and I couldn’t take another night of that so I started just nursing him when he wakes since that’s the fastest way to get him back to sleep. I have also been giving him a dose of Motrin at bedtime and another one when he wakes up if its been 6 hours. His first tooth came in last week but he still hasn’t been sleeping any better and I have still been giving the Motrin because I’m scared not to. Last night he woke up at 12:30, 2:30 and 4:40 and would not go back to sleep after feeding him at 4:40. I spent my morning crying and feeling sorry for myself that at 7 months things still aren’t better. Please HELP!!!
kind of having similar issues…although your make mine sound much better! i was having issues and brought back the dream feed. we feed her in her sleep at 10 pm before going to bed and then we know she is def not hungry. also if there in another time they are always up DF then too. you can wean off the DF but that way you aren’t responding to the cry. if you fed them in the last 4 hrs you know they can’t be hungry. my daughter was doing great and now wakes up between 3:30-4 am babbling and won’t go back to sleep for 45 min-1 hr. driving me crazy! anyone else have any ideas? i was going to try wake to sleep but am terrified!
This happened to mine to at around this time. I did some dream feeding before i went to bed (like 10 pm) as someone else also suggested, merely to reassure myself that when my baby woke up before midnight she wasn’t hungry. i also made sure (again!) that i was putting her down sleepy but awake and letting her get herself to sleep. this really seemed to help, as she would then tend to sleep until 3 or 4 am after doing a bit of crying for bedtime (like 10 minutes). if you’re putting your baby down awake already, then maybe try to do the dream feed and see what happens.
I understand the sleep deprivation aspect of sleep schedules, and I’m a first time mom. However, my 6 month old girl, has always recieved comfort when she needs it. Our day naps are always nurse to sleep, and she doesn’t ever sleep in her crib during the day. She’s on her play mat or play pen etc. at night, we nurse to sleep, and she usually goes down around 9-10 in her crib with nightlite and sleep sheep going, and wakes up at 5-7 ish for a feeding, then back down for another few hours. It’s not fair to say that nursing a baby to sleep will cause sleepless nights, cuz clearly my ‘do what feels natural’ system is working a lot better then some sleep solutions other ladies here are trying. Every baby is different, so one solution may not work for everyone! We are now nursing until she’s drowsy and putting her in the crib almost asleep, going to slowly and painlessly wean her off. But if I let her CIO I end up with a wound up scared upset little girl. They’re only young once, I will cuddle while I can!
That’s good for you that that is working so well but it’s also not fair to say that your “do what feels natural system” is working a lot better than what others are doing. If I could nurse my baby to sleep for every nap and at night and he still napped well and slept all night, then I would do it but for most people it isn’t that easy!
Hey Jayme,
I’m really glad things are going so well for you! Trust me there are MANY parents of 6 month old babies who would LOVE to have a baby go down without a peep and then happily sleep for 8-9 hours. A nice chunk of sleep makes everything so much more manageable and I’m happy it feels natural to you!
But Jamie is right – most babies can do this “nurse to sleep” when they’re younger but for 97% of them it will eventually blow up on them. Usually between 6-8 months. So maybe you are in the 3% that can roll with this and honest we all hope that’s the case!
But if your gentle baby starts waking up hourly, or bedtime devolves into a mess where getting her to fall asleep is increasingly more difficult and takes longer or starts to feel all but impossible, then IF those things happen, you may want to consider that the plan that worked so great when she was born is no longer working.
Or look at it this way, if nursing to sleep worked so great for most babies nobody would ever need to do CIO because it wouldn’t be an issue. But the reality for most is that it almost always does blow up on you eventually. And IF that happens you may feel differently about parents who turn to CIO to solve problems they’ve created. Because IF that happens you may end up being one yourself.
But I hope not.
hi, i have a 9month old son who is sleeping terrible at night. he will nap in his cot on an afternoon for about 45mins which is normal for him, he will also fall asleep on his own but as soon as its bedtime it falls apart and is waking up every hour during the night. we r all sleep deprived even the dog!! anybody got any advice?? thank u.
Hello fellow tired,
I was wondering if others have had the following experience and found anything that helps. My 7 month old is sleeping pretty well these days – falling asleep on her own for naps and night, sleeping through the night. A relief! But every once in a while she starts screaming hysterically a few hours after falling asleep. The pediatrician suggested night terrors but I thought that happened more with older infants? Anyway, we usually wait a bit before rushing in, just in case she’s still sort of asleep (she does moan and sometimes cry out without waking up) but last night she became more hysterical so we went in her room and ultimately picked her up – which didn’t really help. We eventually went outside to walk around for 30mn. Another 15 mn later she seemed calm so we put her in bed – she started screaming again. Finally she spent 20mn using the boob like a paci and I was able to transition her into bed, where she cried 2 mn and went to sleep. Then slept until morning. SO. Any similar experiences, advice, thoughts?