Baby Sleep: What is Normal?
You’re so tired you forgot to put on underwear. There seems to be dried curry on your pants but that can’t POSSIBLY be right because you haven’t had Indian food in 2 weeks. Is that curry? Your baby just fell asleep in the car and you’re so desperate for a break that you’re going to just drive by your house and take a short jaunt to Canada. Because the minute you stop the car she’s going to wake up. And frankly if that happens you’re going to cry the ugly cry.
All the parenting books say the first year with a baby is spent in a haze of sleep deprivation caused by night feedings, teething, ear infections, etc. The other Moms in your playgroup look equally exhausted and your neighbor is still night-nursing her 5-year-old. So this is all normal. Right?
Is There Normal Baby Sleep?
In a word, yes.
For the first few weeks after birth, baby sleep may be all over the map. They may sleep so much you find yourself wondering why other new mommies seem so tired. Or they may never sleep for more than 45-minute windows leaving you wondering how you can possibly make it through one more night.
Most newborn babies are extra fussy for a few hours in the evening, often from 7:00 PM – 10:00 PM. This is known as the “witching hour.” Everybody is exhausted and you can’t even play “pass the cranky baby” because all the people you want to pass the baby to (grandparents, friends, etc.) are at home lounging on the couch thinking about how glad they are not to have a fussy newborn to deal with.
It’s a rough time for everybody and the fussiness and non-sleeping tends to peak at 6 weeks. That doesn’t mean you end up with an easy baby at the 7 week mark but things start to gradually get easier from that point on.
Somewhere between 2 to 6 months your baby will consolidate their naps. This means that instead of taking 4-5 tiny naps throughout the day they’ll take ~3 chunky (45+ minute) naps. However regardless of the configuration of their naps (many small vs. few longer) the total amount of time they spend napping and the total hours of sleep at night should be close to the targets outline in the chart below.
Baby Sleep: How Much, When, How Long
| Age | # Naps | Duration of Naps | Time Between Naps | Bedtime | Hrs of Sleep @ Night | Total Hrs of Sleep per Day |
| Birth – 6 Weeks | 4-8 | 15 minutes – 4 hours | 45 min – 1 hour | Variable but often late 9:00 – 11:00 PM | 8-14 | 14-18 hours |
| 6 Weeks – 3 Months | 3-4 | 30 minutes – 2 hours | 1 hour – 1 hour 45 minutes | Variable but often late 8:00 – 11:00 PM | 8-13 | 11-15 hours |
| 3-6 Months | 3 | 1-2 hours | ~2 hours | 8:00 – 10:00 PM | 9-12 | 12-14 hours |
| 6-9 Months | 3 | 1-2 hours | 2-3 hours | 8:00 – 10:00 PM | 9-12 | 12-14 hours |
| 9-12 Months | 2 | 1-2 hours | ~3 hours | 7:00 – 8:00 PM | 10-12 | 12-14 hours |
| 12-18 Months | 1-2 | 1-2 hours | 3 hours | 7:00 – 8:00 PM | 10-12 | 12-14 hours |
| 18 Months – 3 Years | 1 | 1-2 hours | NA | 7:00 – 8:00 PM | 10-12 | 11-14 hours |
Sources: Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems, R. Ferber, M.D. & Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, M. Weissbluth, M.D.
Keep track of how much your baby is sleeping for a few days. If you’re somewhere close to the numbers in the chart you’re doing OK. If not, maybe it’s time to make a change.
Common Baby Sleep Problems
Baby is Awake Too Long
Use the chart as a guideline. If your baby is awake dramatically longer than what is indicated in the “time between naps” column, she is likely overtired. This is probably the #1 sleep problem that trips up parents with babies under 1. People think babies will simply fall asleep when they need sleep. It would be great if babies worked that way. It would also be great if babies were born knowing how to use the potty. Sadly neither of these is the case.
Baby is Not Getting Enough Sleep
Your baby should not be getting substantially less sleep than is indicated in the “Total Hrs per Day” column. I can’t tell you how often people try to convince me that their baby just doesn’t need that much sleep.
Bollocks.
I’m not saying that helping babies get the sleep they need is easy. Nor am I saying that you should beat yourself up if you’re doing everything you possibly can and your baby isn’t quite getting as much sleep as you would like. But I AM saying that the chart gives you a pretty good idea of how much sleep your child needs. If you’re vastly off the mark, that’s OK. But let’s keep working towards these numbers as a goal.
Bedtime is Too Late
This is the #2 sleep problem people run into. Typically it is caused by two things. The first is that younger babies (under 6 months) tend to take naps late in the afternoon or early evening which means their bedtime is fairly late (9:00PM – 10:30PM). Whey they stop sleeping in the late afternoon their bedtime should be moved up closer to 7:00PM (parents forget this step and keep the original late bedtime). The second cause is that babies generally wake up far earlier than you would like to. Parents will do just about anything to try to get their baby to sleep past 6:00 AM and they often think that keeping them up later at night will do the trick. However generally keeping your baby up late just reduces the total amount of sleep they’re getting and leads to a chronically sleep-deprived baby.
No day is so bad it can’t be fixed with a nap. ~Carrie Snow
Baby Doesn’t Nap at All
If your child is under 3 they almost always need to take a nap. I see parents all the time who have a 2 year old who doesn’t nap who will tell me about how “Little Timmy decided to stop napping just after his 2nd birthday.” Why did Little Timmy get a vote in this decision? Naps are your friend. Even if it seems inconvenient (especially if you have a non-napping older sibling) to maintain a consistent nap schedule with your 2-3 year old preschooler, this is something their little body needs (even if they don’t seem to WANT to do it). Two year old kids are challenging boundaries all day long and are likely to challenge naps as well. Don’t confuse this with a signal that they no longer need a nap.
Baby is Getting Too Much Sleep
I used to believe that there was no such thing as a kid who sleeps too much. In fact I always wanted to be the parent of one of these kids. But I’ve come to learn that some kids who sleep more than expected often have some underlying medical issue that leaves them unusually tired. This is REALLY rare, most often your kid is sleeping longer because you got lucky. If you’re worried, the most frequent causes of sleeping TOO much are sleep apnea and things like celiac disease that hinder your child’s ability to absorb nutrients. Both of which are totally manageable conditions. But if your baby is over 3 months old and seems to sleep far more than what is suggested in the chart, it’s probably time to talk to your pediatrician just make sure everything is OK.
This chart is pretty handy (she pats herself on back) so you may want to download and print out a copy to keep on your fridge for future reference.
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Your MIL is plain wrong. A 4 week old should not be on an imposed schedule. Her wake times should not exceed 30-60 min (including feeding time and the time it takes to soothe for bed/nap). Try a portable crib or bassinette to make her feel more cozy at naptime or bedtime (also white noise, swaddled and a dark room). Or a swing to help her sleep instead of driving around in the car. Feed her at least every 2-3 hrs if she wants it. Breastmilk has all the nutrition a baby needs and most likely, you are producing enough but remember to eat healthy and drink tons of water (set timers to remind yourself). You could also try Mother’s Milk tea if your pediatrician has no isses with it and you’re concerned about your supply. Keeping her up more during the day is probably the reason why she can’t sleep until 1am. Please, please don’t listen to your MIL. Really try to put your baby down more frequently (max.30-60 min awake time) and really watching for sleep cues (spaced out, quiet, rubbing eyes, yawning, rubbing ears, fussy, complete change of behavior). This should help with the late bedtime. Do what you can to help your baby sleep more (use a swing, wear your baby, etc).
Yes yes and yes. You are very kind to answer her questions and your advice is totally right on the mark. Thank you for your gracious and generous input.
Alexis recently posted..The Pediatrics Cry it Out Study
Hey Alexis, I have a few questions about my 7 week old:
1. Right now he seems to sleep ALOT during the day, but he is also sleeping pretty good at night (it doesn’t seem like he has his days and nights mixed up). I was looking at the chart and it says that after 6 weeks babies should be having awake time between 1-2 hours. Other then the morning and evening he really is only awake at one time for about 30 minutes. Do you think I should check with my doctor about that? For example: Today he woke up at 9:45 and I fed him 3 oz. He was awake until about 11:15 at which time he fell asleep in my arms. He woke up at 11:45 and promptly wanted more food so I fed him 4 oz at noon and he was awake until 12:45 when I took him for a walk. He slept in his car seat until about 2:45 and wanted to eat again so I fed him 4 oz and he went back to sleep at 3:15 and is still asleep now at 4:15 in his swing. My mom says I worry too much, but I just want to make sure everything is normal.
2. He has started recently going to sleep at abou 8 o’clock in the evening and then he wants to wake up at 9 to eat and stay awake until about 10:30 or 11. Is there anything I can do to change this or do I just need to go with the flow and he will slowly have more awake time in the evening? He isn’t fussy when he is awake from 9-10:30/11. He just won’t go to sleep.
3. At what point do you try to start moving back bedtime? I know right now he is just going to go to bed late, but I was just curious at what time we can start trying to put him down earlier.
Sorry, lots of questions, thanks for your help. I am IN LOVE with your blog!!
Susan,
To answer your question in minimal words – everything you describe is normal and will sort itself out in time with probably minimal intervention from you. Great news, right?
Here’s the longer version:
1) I’m not at all worried about your babies. The numbers are general guidelines. I don’t like to highlight that fact as invariably there will be somebody who takes the “guideline” idea to validate their belief that their 2 month old just doesn’t need to nap. Does your baby wet tons of diapers? Is he growing? Yes? He’s just fine.
2) He’s napping at 8:00 PM and his bedtime is 11:00 PM. All totally normal. Not a ball of laughs but normal. This is also why he doesn’t wake up till 9:45 AM (his “night” is 11:00 PM – 9:45 AM = 11 hours = awesome). Check the post below for how you can start chipping away at this late bedtime stuff.
3) You could chill out about it for a few weeks and see what happens organically or you could start waking him up a bit earlier. Without the “wake him up a bit earlier” part there is a good chance that putting him down earlier won’t work well (although you are welcome to try!). Do things gradually – plunking him in bed 1 hour earlier will go poorly but usually babies are pretty open to 15-20 adjustments in schedule.
So glad you love my blog! I try. It’s not always easy (generally when I write one of my children is pelting me in the head with legos) but awesome comments from nice people like you help a lot
Alexis recently posted..Bedtime What Time?
Thanks so much for your fast reply! How much earlier would you suggest I get him up? 15-20 minutes? Also, one more question. Today he had pretty much slept from 2 o’clock on. It is now almost 9. Is this normal for a 7 week old? We did go a lot today so he spent a good amount of time in his car seat. The last 3 or so hours we have been at home though and he has still continues to sleep. I guess I am worried he is going to start getting days and nights mixed up again. Can that happen at this age? Thanks again, this whole baby thing has really thrown me for a loop because i want concrete answers and I obviously know there are not any.
Hello, I have a 4 week old and she loves her sleep during the day. She tends to be awake for 1-2 hours and then sleeps couple hours. Seems like an endless cycle of wake, eat, sleep all day long. During the night, she wakes 2-3 times to eat and remains awake for 1-3 hours. She screams if I put her down when she’s not sleepy (however when she gets sleepy, she has no problem with me swaddling her and putting her down). Seems that nursing her and rocking her put her into sleep mode but it can take as long as 3 hours. She shrieks when I put her in the car seat or swing too. She just wants to be held. Any tips on this or do I simply wait it out?
Hi Alexis,
I have a couple of questions for you:
1) is there such a thing as too much soothing? My 10 week old has slept great since I started using white noise, a swing, and swaddling starting at 5 weeks. She averages about 17 hours a day, with approx. 12 hrs at night. I wonder if I should try weaning her off one of the soothing elements now since she seems to sleep more than average, or just count my blessings and wait until she’s a bit older? I’m also wondering if I should just let her sleep even if her naps are excessive (over 3 hours once a day on most days). The downside to her sleeping so much is that I don’t feel like she has a lot of time to “learn”. She has fussy time from 7-10pm and its the only time she doesn’t nap (maybe a cat nap 15mins long) but she isn’t receptive to doing anything except cluster feed every half hour.
2) your chart shows the approx. time awake per day and between naps; that includes feeding time right?
Thank you so much! Your blog ended the madness and sleep deprivation 5 weeks ago and now almost makes it easy…almost
So our 7-mo-old is on the high end of the total-sleep-per-day range (15 hrs). Her awake time is 3 hours (like clockwork) so her schedule is:
6:30-7:00 wake up
9:30-10:00 down for nap
11:30 wake up from nap
2:30-4:00 nap
7:00-7:30 bed
95% of the time she’s an awesome sleeper so the schedule is pretty close every day. She dropped the 3rd nap at about 5 months, and pushing bedtime later does not result in a later morning wake-up – we’ve tried
I’s like there aren’t enough hours in the day for her to sleep as much as she wants. We end up having to wake her up from both naps to protect bedtime; that means if we let her take longer naps she still gets the same amount of sleep, just more during the day.
So my question is, what is the importance of day vs night sleep? Since they are guided by different parts of the brain, I would assume they have similar but potentially different benefits. I am not worried that she’s getting enough sleep; I’m just wondering if our strategy is the best (i.e., putting limits on naps to preserve the 11-12 hrs at night).
And this is totally low priority- I am mostly curious. Thanks!
We are having trouble with super early wake ups!!
Our son is almost 8 months old, and a couple weeks ago we finally started cry it out. Only at bedtime at first, then anytime before 12:00 that he woke. It seemed to be going really well. He only cries a few minutes at bedtime now, and has been consistently sleeping through until 12, sometimes 2!
He has always had trouble sleeping in the early morning, with tons of wake ups. But he is down to only one, around 3. However, where previously he used to wake up at 6, then 5, then 4:30, now it is at 4:00!!! He is wide awake and smiling, there is no way we are getting him back to sleep. I don’t dare let him CIO in the early morning, will he just cry a ton and not really go back to sleep?
Further details: he was going to bed consistently at 7:00, now around 6:30. He naps 4 times a day still (he just can’t go longer than 2.5 hours, and with the early wake up he needs the 4th nap. One nap is 1.5 hrs and the rest are usually 30 minutes, maybe 45 if we are lucky.
Hi, just wanted to update on this. I am not sure I need an answer anymore. For some reason (not sure what changed) he started sleeping until 5 again, which isn’t great but we can deal with it. Though if you have any thoughts I would love to hear them, in case this problem comes back.
I have a 3 1/2 month old. She was sleeping 6 hours before eating and then sleeping another 3 before having some awake time. Now she is back to waking every 3 hours. She naps pretty well, but can only be awake 1 hour or at most an 1 1/2 before needing to nap and then she naps for 1 1/2 hour. So she ends up taking 5 naps and going to bed at 10. Is she. Sleeping too much? Should I try to keep her awake longer between naps?
My 3 month old and one week baby girl started sleeping more past 3 days.she was up all day before this happened then slept a good 5 hours straight which new to me and ate and sleeping again.took get on long car ride she slept 2 hours there and ate and slept again.is she sleeping too much or am I being paranoid. She slept on and off today but took her to Walmart she was up half the time but slept more than normal at night she also had tummy ache spit up before she slept.I’m just worrying
Hi, my little boy is 10 weeks old tomorrow and pretty much falls within your chart with his sleep/ awake time. He sleeps great at night, with his big chunk 4-8 hours in a row and then dream feeding twice until waking between 6.30 and 7.30 am. His naps – since the last couple of weeks – are not that great however, he only stays awake 1-2 hours at a time bit his naps don’t last more than an hour now, usually 20-45 minute, apart from exceptions. Is this OK? My real question though is that his soother to fall asleep each time is the breast, so his pattern is never eat-play-sleep, but rather eat-sleep-play, and more often than not eat-sleep-eat-play… Ending up with many nursing sessions/ snacks and nothing resembling a feeding pattern!… He is exclusively breastfed and gaining weight great and hitting all milestones great too. Just had this question re the feeding as he won’t fall asleep without my breast (have tried rocking/ pacifier/ white noise etc…) and I don’t see how this will change! Is it too early to worry about it? The white noise btw is a lifesaver, accompanied by the breast works wonders. Thanks for your insight!!
Btw… since my comment above, today he had a 3and a half hour morning nap!… So weird… Not waking him up as the time to myself is welcome (guilty!). I guess erratic nap times at 10 weeks is normal?… Thanks again
hi, I have found your articles and chart on sleep really useful, and some of it reassuring in that I don’t think I am doing anything horribly ‘wrong’…which is why I write to you now! I am flummoxed as to why my 8 month old son has, in the last two weeks or so, started to wake up 1/2/3 hours after he has already fallen asleep for the night, then deciding to STAY AWAKE FOR 2-3 HOURS FOR NO OBVIOUS REASON!
He falls asleep by himself in his cot, without me in the room, both at nap time and bedtime. We have had a solid bedtime routine for the last few months – nappy/clothes change, breastfeeding, sleeping bag on, story, prayer, cuddle, put down in cot awake. He usually has a bath between dinner and the bedtime routine, too.
He usually has 2 longer naps and a short nap during the day, totalling 2-3 hours a day. He will comfortably stay awake between naps for 2-2.5 hours depending on how good/bad his night sleep has been. He has only ever ‘slept through’ a handful of times, so he has never been a champion sleeper. We still often have nights when he wakes every 3 hours or so, though not necessarily for a feed – sometimes he has wind, or teething pain, but will go back to sleep quite quickly after the necessary feed/ burp/ teething powder/ patting on the back. However, we are increasingly getting more nights where he will sleep in 4-5 hour stretches, or occasionally even more. With this new staying awake phenomenon, even though he is sleepy, he will stay awake and make lots of silly noises which drive me crazy on the monitor and don’t let me fall asleep myself. I feed him if he is hungry. He gets drowsy after his feed, but still does not actually go back to sleep.
His last nap of the day is variable, sometimes longer (more than an hour) and sometimes v short (30 or 45 mins) is usually done by 5/5.30 p.m. These days, in order to fit in dinner as well as bath time and milk feed, I try not to let him sleep past 5.15 provided he has had enough sleep earlier in the day. I aim to have him in his cot before 8. In fact, he is usually visibly tired by 7 p.m. So I try to ensure his last milk feed starts by 7 latest in order to avoid him falling asleep during the feed. Usually, he is fast asleep by 7.30/7.45. Should I be lengthening the time between his last nap and bedtime? E.g making sure he is awake by 4/4.30 and letting him fall asleep by 7.30 ish? Or should I be making bedtime later? My problem with the latter is that he genuinely seems ready to sleep well before 8.
During this new waking up period, he is not particularly grouchy or in pain etc. he just seems to talk to himself, roll around etc. Last night, he woke at 9.45, i fed and burped him and he was drowsy again by 10.15 ish, but did not actually go to sleep till 12.15. He then woke again at 4.15 for a feed and went right back to sleep till 9.45a.m.
Please, please, please give me some advice/suggestions as this just seems like a terrible waste of time and sleep!
Yours hopefully
Dear Alexis,
I have read this article and comments hoping to find some miracle cure for my 7 week old son. Unfortunately he fails to even meet the minimum needed sleeping hours. He barely sleeps 8h/24h. I am breastfeeding and co-sleeping. He simply refuses to go to sleep especially during daytime. Napping is usually done at my breast – if I take it out he wakes up and he does not like the pacifier. I feel like a binky with legs. I have tried white noise, grey noise, classical music, lullabies, rocking, sometimes not even breastfeeding does the trick. I am a step away from depression and illness. He hates swaddling and the swing.
Is there any other way I could help him go to sleep? At nights he falls asleep only at my breast and waking up every hour or so when he loses it
I put him down around 8 p.m and by 4 a.m he is wide awake, crying and fussing, nothing soothes him. Eventually he cats naps until 7 a.m when he wakes up for good. From there,whatever I do he simply resists sleep. Please do help…
P.S Excuse my mistakes, English is not my first language.
Sometimes putting baby on a routine does help. I had my first on a routine very early on he is now two and a half, sleeps seven til seven with a two hour nap in the afternoon. My now ten week old has been on a routine from two weeks, he has two two hour naps in the day, occasionally a half an hour nap in the afternoon, bed at 7pm, dreamfeed at half ten, sleeps until five ish feeds, then sleeps again until seven or half seven. He also puts himself to sleep within five minutes of being put down, without crying or fussing. This is because I always from day one put him down regularly for naps and before he started to cry I would pick him up calm him down then put him down again until he is asleep, now he knows when he is put down, it’s sleep time.
Hi, I was just wondering if you thought my 7.5 month old was sleeping too much? She sleeps about 12.5 hours at night and 3 naps totaling about 3.25 hours. This is over your 14 hour estimate. She is happy otherwise and we are looking into dropping her 3rd nap soon (which would take her down about .5 hours). I never thought she had anything wrong with her so never thought to ask the doc about it, I will on her 9 mo check though (his answer I’m sure will be if she is happy then don’t fix it!) Also do you recommended keeping the 3rd nap until 9 mos? Thanks!
My 11 month old has always been a huge, easy sleeper. I’m concerned because she never moves in her sleep. She remains in the same position for every nap and nighttime sleep. She may turn her head from one side, but she sleeps hands up above head and legs spread without an ounce of movement. Is this ok?
I have an 8 month old baby boy an he sleeps about 10 hours at night an takes about 3 naps a day which i saw was good for his age. The thing I’m worried about is he takes really long naps about 3-4 hours instead of 1-2 hours and he stays awake generally 2 hours between naps. Is this a really bad thing?
This is good keep up the good work, I wish my baby did the same but she is just opposite:(
Hi Alexis
Its so lovely that you take the time to reply to all of us mums! Im hoping you can help me with some advice about catnapping and the best age to start routines.
My baby girl (breastfed) is 10 weeks old.
After 3 weeks old and up to 6, she never put herself to sleep and i learnt quite quickly that i needed to help her and would soothe her to sleep with cuddles and rubs on the back. she would then nap on me, pretty much until the time came i couldnt stay laying down any longer so id put her down. Within 5 minutes she always woke. So it was then wake up time, feed play etc.
From 6 weeks she started waking on me after a short time, so i thought maybe it was time to put her in her cot. quite quickly she adapted to a rock, pat, ssshhh and would crash quickly in my arms. I was amazed the first time i was able to put her in her cot and she didnt wake after 5 mins. However she couldnt nap for longer than 45 mins and after a few days this became 25 mins and has stuck for the past 4 weeks.
the only way for her to have her sleep longer is to lay on me, so we now do this twice a day for 1 to 2 hours and once or twice i put her down for catnaps. hoping each day they may become longer.
i have tried to put her down drowsy, but she wakes in an instance and is wide awake.
i also try to get her back to sleep after her catnap and its near impossible. sometimes she wakes really tired and other times is smily and cheerful.
obviously i cant keep laying down for 3 hours a day, but have tried to enjoy it while she is so little.
its also hard to engage when she’s hungry cause she doesnt wake because she’s tired so our feeding ends up all over the place and sometimes she’s so tired she just falls asleep.
So my questions for you are…
when is the best time/age for me to really persist in getting her to sleep longer and in her own bed.
and, what do you think is the best way to go about this? (put down awake, soothing etc).
I dont want to pressure my newborn or put myself through trying super hard to get her sleeping when maybe its too early?
Thank you so much in advance!!
Alysha x
Alysha recently posted..Much to be Grateful For
oh my you could be describing our situation exactly except I have a little boy who will only ever sleep for longer than 10 minutes (in the swing!) if he is on me literally!
going out of my mind and as much as i love him i’m sure he too poor thing would sleep better on his own
Hates swaddling (my sister who swaddled her daughter, tried and he was hysterical she thinks he’s too old to start now at 9 wks) please advise i’ll try anything?!!
Hi there Alysha and Petitharicot! Just wondering what your situation is now, and whether you received any useful advice?? Im desparately looking fortips, as I have the same situation with my 11 week old. Reasonably good night sleeper, but ALL her naps must be taken in the sling! Its the only way I can get her to sleep properly, any other method and she wakes up as soon as the buggy / car stoos moving, the basket stops being rocked etc etc. In happy to persisit in my efforts to change her sling addiction, if I thought it would lead aynwhere – thats why I ask! But Ive abandoned all attempts recently as I just feel so sorry for her when I can see she hasnt slept well and is tired, when I know she needn’t be if I just put her in the sling for a good nap…. Help!!
Hi,
Best site ever. I like you postings. My 1 year old son is trying to get up in the middle of night between 2-5 AM (~9.30 PM bedtime) (anytime) and does not want to go to sleep at all. He will be sleepy, eyes open but babbling/crying himself. Even if we rock, walk nothing works for at least 1 hour. Finally yesterday he slept on his own (cosleeping with my husband, rolling all over bed) after 2.5 hours. He does not have fever, doesn’t look like teeth (has 4). Not sure sleep regression! He gives hard time for his afternoon nap and night nap before sleeps finally. Not started CIO yet (did with 6 year old girl and felt so bad about it). Just feel so frustrated (I know its going to end in few months, But…)with this as so busy with job, daughters projects at school and when I read your articles, start my day afresh. I am also weaning him off the bottles and evening nap(last 3 weeks).
I think CIO is only option now.
Keep on writing:-)
Please help me I’m going crazy! I am a mother of 3 beuatiful kids I never did have a problem with the first two they were good sleepers but. Didn’t breast feed them so that could be a differnce. Our youngest is 8 1/2 months and I will be going back to work soon for the afternoon shift.
I have tried and tried so many times to put her down while she is awake after a bath and after a good breast feed and all she does is scream and scream. My question is how long do you let them scream for because she can cry up to a couple hours then I give in as I think it is way too long. My baby girl has 5-10 cat naps and she has done this since she has been born but yet goes to bed around 10 and sleeps until 9 am waking up about 5 times a night for a reassurance feed. I don’t let her cry in the middle of the night because I have two school aged children and a husband that needs his sleep for his job. I also live in a townhouse complex and the neighbours will be able to hear as well. So please help me as I’m having issues with her sleeping anytime of the day.
Please help me I’m going crazy! I am a mother of 3 beuatiful kids I never did have a problem with the first two they were good sleepers but. Didn’t breast feed them so that could be a differnce. Our youngest is 8 1/2 months and I will be going back to work soon for the afternoon shift.
I have tried and tried so many times to put her down while she is awake after a bath and after a good breast feed and all she does is scream and scream. My question is how long do you let them scream for because she can cry up to a couple hours then I give in as I think it is way too long. My baby girl has two 5-10 mins cat naps and she has been doing this since she has been born but yet goes to bed around 10 and sleeps until 9 am waking up about 5 times a night for a reassurance feed. I don’t let her cry in the middle of the night because I have two school aged children and a husband that needs his sleep for his job. I also live in a townhouse complex and the neighbours will be able to hear as well. So please help me as I’m having issues with her sleeping anytime of the day.
You see you said 3 naps a day for 3-6 months how long should these naps be my little one normally
wakes 7
nap 9-10
nap 12-2/2.30
nap between 4/5 for 30 minutes so she can last till 7
6 baths massage bed time tv in back ground while feeding tv off in to cot dummy which i SO regret using for night time but love it during the day haha! but cant have every think i guess!
but ive noticed since she is going in her cot she wakes alot more i think she enjoys being cosy in her carry cot but she has pretty much grown out of it but in her carry cot she will go down at 7 normally we give her her last half oz in her and thats it not much fussing (although id rather she would just settle her self but not sure how to approach that tbh) then she wont wake till 5 for a quick like an oz or 2 then back down till 7-8 but since she is in her cot she wakes every 3-4 and will have a feed each time and is harder to settle but also the last few days she has been having bigger sleeps in the day as she wasnt feeling to well and didnt sleep for a whole day so ive been letting her catch up but she is still sleeping more should i just keep waking her up when her nap normally ends or leave her be and see how she is as i have heard the better sleep they have in the day the better they sleep at night but how much is too much lol!
Hi Alexis!
I just found out this site and it’s fantastic. My daughter who is 11 months old, she is turning one year at the end of this month is a good sleeper, but lately things have change a little bit.
She goes to bed anytime between 7:00 pm – 7:45pm she sleeps,she usually wakes up at 7:00-7:15 am every morning, then she is ready for her morning nap around 9:00 a.m, during this nap she falls sleep right away, maybe she plays at her crib for 10 minutes but isn’t an issue, then she is up after one hour and half or 2 hours. Usually I put her down again around 2:30 but now she doesn’t fall sleep until one hour or one hour and half later and I knwo she is tired because sometimes whe are in the car and she falls sleep around 2:15 pm, so I’m not sure what to do since I thought that maybe she wasn’t enought tired but every time that we are driving around her nap time she falls sleep easily. But in her crib she seems super excited and ready to play. I can’t cut her morning nap because is so clear that she is super tired around sometimes around 8:45.
Please if you can give me some ideas. I’m really active and I take her out every day to indoor playground, play dates or I play with her. Maybe she is too excited? Sometimes I stay home and I just play with her but doesn’t make any difference.
Please help!
Sorry I forgot to say that when she falls sleeps around 3:30-3:45 if I let her sleep in she would do it until 6 im and goes easily to bed at 8:30 pm. Usually I wake her up at 4:30 pm but today we want to see, with my husband, if she was really tired, and she was since she wakes up at 6… really happy. But for me a 3:30 nap is too late. We thought to make her morning nap shorter and wakes her up at 10:30 a.m but it’s healthy wakes her up?
Naps:4 month old(16wks). We recently (2wks now) went from 3 2-3 hour naps every day to 4-5 30 min naps. Baby girl wakes up at the 30 min mark ON THE DOT every time. This is affecting her day time mood and ability to stay awake. No impact on her night sleeping which is wonderful: 7:15pm-7:15am with 1-2 wakes for feed. I’ve tried nursing to sleep first, swaddle(which she uses at night), white noise, letting her cry after the 30 mins, pack n play, swing, stroller, crib, blackout blinds. Man, you name it, I’ve tried it. I’m very attentive to her tired signs and usually get her to bed before the eye rubbing and crankiness come on. I don’t know what to do to get her back to “good” naps. I haven’t left the house in 4 days to get her back on track, but no progress. Help!!
Amy, I know it’s not any help, but we are in the same boat!! It’s driving me crazy. My son has been doing it for a while now. I’m like you and I’ve tried everything. I’ve been frantically looking for a magical answer and I often wonder if I’m doing something wrong. I hope things get better for us soon!
Thanks girl. Good luck to you!
Same here. No real advice, just commiseration. I like to say at 3 months she became self aware and the world is just way to interesting to miss a minute. She wakes up at 35 minutes on the nose (even in a swing with vibration and white noise in a dark room) and acts like you tricked her into falling asleep and she’s mad that she missed something. She is also taking 4-5 a day like yours because she can still only stay awake 1.5 to 2 hours before she starts showing sleepy signs. I know nap consolidation is a milestone, so maybe it is just a phase and one of those temporary back steps. Unfortunately it has been going on for a month and a half now, but it has certainly been a month and a half of huge mental and physical development. I just got a different swing (very different movement from my last) and yesterday she took a 1.25 hour and 45 minute nap so now my eggs are in this new swing basket and I’m convinced all our problems are solved…or the novelty of the new swing will wear off tomorrow. Good luck!
Amy, my son is 20 weeks and sounds almost exactly like your child in regards to sleep patterns. Around 1-2 months of age he was taking some short naps (30-45 minutes) and usually a long afternoon nap (2-3 hours). Then around 2.5-3 months of age almost all of his naps were 30 minutes on the dot. Now he is almost 5 months old and all of his naps are still 30 minutes on the dot! He too still needs 4-5 naps a day and can only typically stay up for 1.5 hours at a time before becoming overtired. I have tried many things as well: black out shades, white noise, swaddle, no swaddle, warmer and colder house temperature, socks, no socks, nursing before nap, etc. Nothing seems to matter. I have tried putting him down later, hoping he’d be more tired so he would sleep longer, but this didn’t work and only resulted in him having less naps, and therefore being more tired and cranky during the day. I also tried letting him cry it out after a short nap but he cried for almost an hour and then it was almost time for his next nap!! At night he sleeps from about 7 pm until 7 am and wakes twice to eat in between. I have no idea what to do. Right now my only idea is to wait it out in hopes that it gets better with age. Has anyone found a solution to this or does anyone have an insight?
Jessica G. recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
Our little girl (almost 1 yr now) did something similar around 4 months. Awesome night sleep, crappy naps. It took about a month and a half for her to consolidate naps and get on a (mostly) predictable schedule. It was…..extremely lame. We never left the house either
But she gradually started to have longer naps every once in a while, then one nap a day would be long and the others short, and then by 7 mo both naps were so long we had to wake her up to protect bedtime. We actually write down her sleep/eat schedule every day, and it helped me realize that things weren’t quite as wonky as I thought so I could relax about it a little bit. Good luck and hang in there!
First of all, this is a great site and has been very helpful!
My question is, my son is 8 weeks old and what I’ve been reading basically says do what you need to do to soothe them to sleep until they are about 4-6months old, then at that time you basically have to sleep train to break the habits that you have created with pacifier, swing etc.
Are there things that I can do now to create good sleep habits? I try putting him down awake but drowsy and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. I don’t know if that has to do with his age and the fact that he is still so young.
I have learned from your site that I was letting his wake periods go too long during the day so I have spent the last couple of days trying to limit them and making sure he has quality naps during the day. He has been a great sleeper at night and the last 2 weeks he has been sleeping 6-8 hours in a row without waking but naps are more of a challenge.
Anyways, just wanted to know if there’s anything I can do to streamline the process now and make it easier down the road.
Thanks!
My 4 week old just slept 8 hours over night. I woke her up to feed her and she has gone back to sleep and has been sleeping for 3 hours. I don’t know whether to wake her. She was awake a lot yesterday so I don’t know if she’s catching up. She doesn’t have weight issues that I know of and she’s not sick that I know of either. Do I still need to wake her for feedings or will she wake for them? She normally stirs if she is hitting feeding times. I’m worried about her. She has gained her birthweight back by two weeks but the next doctors appointment isn’t for another month so I’m not sure what her weight is.
Hello,
My boy is now 13 weeks old and on average he goes down around 9:30 but after only 5 hours he will wake up for a feed then go back down for 3 hours before waking up for the day. he has teased me a few times by sleeping 6-7hours straight for a few nights but then always goes back to the 5 hour stretch last night was only 4!
Thanks
Sleepy muma
Firstly I would just like to say a big THANK YOU for this blog!! I have been obsessively pouring over every single baby book, website and blog you could possibly imagine and so far this is the only one that really speaks to me and I don’t leave it feeling guilt ridden or anxious about how things are going with my baby.
That said I still need some advice/reassurance about my little girl. She is exactly 12 weeks today and from the moment she turned 2 weeks old has not been a great sleeper. She is quite colicky which has never helped and has never really had solid naps or any kind of regularity to her sleeps so I am really concerned that she is chronically overtired. We do everything from swaddling to white noise to the swing and although we might get the occasional 2 hour nap it is always spot on 40 mins. She just doesn’t seem to be able to get past that first sleep cycle. I swear i spend most of the day trying to get her some sleep but sometimes no matter how hard ill try she will go hours and i mean hours not sleeping! During the night she does sleep better although we usually start her routine at 5.30 and she will only fall asleep and stay asleep between 10.30/11. The last few nights she has been up every hour which I am really hoping is just a growth spurt or wonder week because usually I can get at least 4 hours between night time feeds. Another thing you should know is she is not a great eater always pulling away at the breast and fussing, regardless of whether its a quiet environment or not. She will also do this when I express into a bottle. We have had her looked over for reflux and this doesn’t seem to concern the doc. She also hates the car, the pram and the carrier so leaving the house is always a nightmare.
I am convinced this all comes down to the fact that she is overtired, so my question for you is how do we get out of this vicious cycle? We watch her signals like a hawk and put her down (she can put herself to sleep most of the time) but without fail will wake up that 40 later, making it even harder for her to fall asleep and stay asleep the next time – and round and round we go! It’s so heartbreaking to see my baby so irritable with dark rings under her eyes. I just wish I could help her get some sleep!
Thanks Alexis anything you can suggest would be greatly appreciated!
Ash, I don’t have any answers for you but my baby is 20 weeks and only takes 30-40 minute naps. I know that when he is tired he doesn’t eat well because he’s cranky. So maybe try to feed your baby shortly after she wakes so she is not tired yet, and therefore maybe won’t fuss as much. (Maybe you already do this, but thought I’d throw it out there.)
Jessica G. recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
Thanks for the reply Jessica! Ah how I wish that would work! I do try to feed bub when she wakes up as I’m desperately trying to get into the sleep feed play sleep routine but she is way to interested and distractable with everything going on around her (even in a quiet dark room!) that I can’t even get a solid feed into her. She will feed for maybe 5 mins tops:( it’s usually only when she is tired and ready to nap that she will settle into a feed but obviously I’m trying to avoid nursing to sleep.
The last few days I have been expressing into a bottle again and she seems to be taking it quite well, and at least I can follow her wandering eyes with a bottle! I hate expressing but I know now how much she is getting and its stopping the snacking on the breast. Maybe after awhile of consistent feeding I can maybe even write off feeding as being the route cause of catnapping!
How often are you feeding your baby? After each catnap or after a couple? K
I’m holding out for the day mine consolidates her naps – If she ever will!
Hi! I think it’s fine that you feed yours before naps. I know people who do that, and it works fine for them. I know they say, “feed, play, sleep,” but not everyone does that. I think if you feed before her naps then you know she’s not waking early out of hunger anyway. I nurse my baby every 2.5-3 hours during the day. That is when he seems to get hungry, and I still just feed him on demand. He is 20 weeks. He will not take a bottle from me. I am not sure if it causes his catnaps or not. Everyone I asked said to still just nurse him on demand. I usually feed him a little while after he wakes up (if he’s hungry, which he usually is). So if he wakes at 7, I might feed him at 7:30 and then maybe goes down for a nap around 8:30/8:45 until 9:00-9:15, then I would feed him again around 10:00. That’s a typical “schedule/routine” for us. I don’t like to feed him too close to sleep time because then I can’t always distinguish between whether he’s hungry or tired, since he’s not on a schedule yet. I also don’t like to feed him immediately after he wakes because I didn’t want him to wake just to eat. It’s been a real struggle for me to get him on a timed schedule because of his short naps. He still takes 30-40 minute naps. I have tried everything to get him to sleep longer, but it’s very rare if it does. He will sleep longer if I hold him, but I can’t do that much, and of course I want him to learn to sleep longer on his own. My sister’s baby took catnaps until she was about 6 months old, and then started sleeping longer on her own. I am really hoping this happens with my little one!!! Good luck! There is no one right way to do things, so whatever works for you is great. I taken me a while to learn that as a first time mom. Also, to give up control about the sleep issues!
Jessica G. recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
I just wanted to say “YAAAAAAAY!” to Jessica’s comment here.
100 gold stars for Jessica. Thanks so much for sharing this thoughtful and helpful comment
Also I hate “sleep feed play sleep ” or E.A.S.Y. For a lot of reasons. The idea is that it’s trying to force you not to nurse/feed baby to sleep which in theory is a good thing. But most people are going to quickly fall back on some other thing that will blow up on you (holding baby for all naps, rocking to sleep, etc.) so really you’re just switching one “soothe to sleep” method for another.
Secondly – it creates the possibility that your baby takes short naps because they wake up hungry. And this is REALLY common! One of my sleep consult peeps had this exact problem. When she switched up feedings (more per day) voila – longer naps happened!
Especially with newborns you want to be generous with feedings and not worry so much about spacing them out or getting them on a schedule. I know we all love schedules so we can plan our day and have some idea about what will be happening when. But that is not how newborns are wired. It’ll come (generally by 6 months sometimes sooner) but hungry babies sleep poorly so sometimes MORE is more.
Thanks for chiming in Jessica
Alexis recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
Hi my LG is 5 month and from being 2 weeks old has only ever napped for 30 mins unless in pram or car but now even they don’t keep her asleep. she has always gone to bed between 8/9 and slept till 7/8 waking once but for the hang last 4 weeks she’s only sleeping till midnight then 3 then 7 she wants feeding but because she doesn’t sleep long in the day i can’t catch up help lol
thanks in advance
Hello! Thank you so much for this website. We have started putting our 13 week old in his swing around 8pm and he will sleep until 11:30-1ish. However, whenever I put him back in his sleep after feeding him, he either wakes up – like instantly wide awake – or he sleeps for 1.5-2 hours max, after church I just succumb and bring him to our bed where he’ll sleep 3-4 hours. I would love for him to sleep in the swing for the whole night. Any suggestions? Thank you!!
Um that should say “after which”, not “after church”. Sorry it’s 5:25 and I’m on feeding number 3.
Hi Alexis!
So glad I found your site as I have been researching my plethora of baby sleep problems. You have made me feel better about quite a few things already, like having my son Benjamin fall asleep in his swing. I do have a few questions though:
How do you figure cluster feeding into all of this? I wonder because in looking at your schedule, he is not getting that much sleep between 6-12:30, and now that I think about it, maybe he is overtired? Benjamin typically cluster feeds from 6ish-12:30. He nurses about every hour during this time, sometimes even sooner, often falling asleep at my breast.We do try to fit a “bedtime” routine in during this, typically consisting of a bath and massage in between one of his clusters.
When we try to transition him to the bassinet in the pack in play (in our room)anywhere between 11:30-12:30, we try to swaddle him. This works 50/50. What typically happens is:
a) he is so upset once he realizes what is going on it seems he is impossible to swaddle, breaking out of it
b) He grunts/groans/other baby sounds for anywhere between 30 minutes to an hour, hour and a half, but then finally falls asleep (in the swaddle)
c) he will cry hysterically. (and I feel strongly against crying it out…it just seems wrong at his age, or at any age)
Rarely does he ever just…go to sleep.
Thank you in advance!
Jessica
Hello
I have an 8 month old who I’ve really been struggling with regarding sleep. She’s a pretty good night time sleeper but naps are rarely more than an hour. She’ll have phases where they get even worse and we get a lot of 30-45 minute naps. And sometimes you can’t get her to take a nap at all. I’ve tried everything…crying it out, soothing, taking the pacifier away, different wake periods, different schedules. We couldn’t get her to wake up for the first two months of her life and ever since 3 months old …..we can’t get her to sleep!! I’ve always heard that anything under an hour wasn’t really a good nap. Should I just be happy with a 30 minute nap and hope the next one is better? If she naps 30 minutes do I put her down earlier for the next nap or keep her up for a usual duration?
Thanks so much!!
Thanks so much for this chart, it really clarified some things for me. My daughter is 11 weeks old and cat naps in morning and evening for about 45 minutes but sleeps 3 hours from about 12:30…. She could sleep more, I gently wake her. Is this 3 hour nap too long?
Oh I should mention that she generally goes to bed at 8:30 and wakes anywhere between 2:30 and 4 for a feed, back down until 7, although that only started about 10 days ago
How long is too long?? My two month old has been sleeping at night for about 7-9 hours straight at night. I know I should count my blessings for this gift right now because I am sure it will change but is there a point where I should worry. In the mornings she seems generally happy and has anywhere from about 3-4 one hour naps throughout the day, and occasionlly will have a 2-3 hour nap. As with all babies, she is extremely cranky in the evenings.
Just wondering how long is too long at this young age and should I maybe be seeing my MD re:long sleeping….
Hi. I am really in need of some advice. I have a 21 week old daughter. We are having problems getting her to sleep, and stay asleep. Her current routine is
6:30 am- Feed. Offered 8ozs, takes between 5-6.
8am- Tired cues, will nap until around 9-915am
10am- offered 8ozs, and baby rice flavoured with fruit puree
Between 10:50-11:15- she will go down for a nap in the cot. She will generally sleep for around 2 hours.
13:30- offered 8ozs, fidgets a lot (we are using infant gaviscon for reflux)
We then struggle to get her to nap in the afternoon, even when she shows that she is tired! I try to take her for a walk. She can sometimes nap for around 45mins to an hr.
16:30- offered 8ozs and a some taster spoonfuls of veg puree.
Even more of a struggle to get her to cat nap. We use white noise, the hoover etc anything that stops her from either crying or the high pitched screams (like over excitement). Always seems quite unsettled in the evenings.
19:30-take her up for a bath and bottle. She is offered 8 ozs, but tonight she only took 4.
Sometimes she falls asleep while having her bottle. I wind her, and then put her down. But by this point, as soon as her head hits the mattress, she wakes up!We have tried letting her cry it out, she escalates so quick into hysteria, and it can take hours to calm her down. For example, tonight, she fell asleep by 8pm, put down, but woke up, and is still awake in her cot now.
Also, she will not sleep through. She is restless and moans a great deal. Getting her dummy back in can settle her back down.
I just don’t know what else we can try!!
Ok, so, 8-14 hours per night for a 4 week old? Is that for BF babies or formula fed babies?
Tracie recently posted..Our New Arrival!!!
Hi my lo is 7 weeks old and will not sleep unless in my arms in the day when she is asleep I will put her down(Moses basket) and she will instantly wake up screaming so for last 2 weeks she has been awake 3/4pm-11/12am by 5/6pm she does not stop crying unless in my arms I know she is tired and i also have a 3 year old so can not hold her all day just wondered if you could advise or help oh and she will go 11/12am feed 12/1 asleep 2/3 feed sleep straightaway 5/6 feed awake until 8/9 feed sleep only in pushchair or carseat feed 11/12 again in carseat untill 2/3/4 awake untill 11/12
The answer is MORE soothing. Lots of babies can’t nap in a moses basket or crib. If she likes the carseat then use it (frankly I would lean towards a swing). More soothing – swaddle and white noise whenever she sleeps. Do everything here:
http://www.troublesometots.com/newborn-baby-sleep-survival-guide/
Part of this is the witching hour so the long window of being awake (admittedly that is REALLY long) is sort of normal for a newborn. But more soothing will help make that shorter and help get you out of the “put down she screams” struggles you’re having at naptime. Good luck!
Alexis recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
Alexis,
I’m desperate! My little girl is a few days shy of 21 weeks old. She is usually a very happy baby. My biggest issue with her is sleep. At around 10 weeks she started sleeping through the night. Going to bed around 11 waking up between 6-8. I would change her, feed her and she would fall back asleep until 9-11. Around 15 weeks she began “teething” ( no teeth have broken through yet) and will not ever sleep through the night. My problem is I can never get her to sleep before 11 pm. I go into her room with a night light on and rock to her calm her down or we keep her in the dim living room with us until she falls asleep. She will wake up around 3-4am wanting a bottle or to be changed. Then fall back asleep until around 6-8. Ill start the process of changing feeding and she’ll fall back asleep until 9-11am. She takes 2-3 naps during the day usually 30 mins to an hour. I feel like I am failing as a mother. I don’t know how or what to do to get her on a better schedule. It seems like this week it’s gotten ten times worse because the “teething” pain seems to be increasing. I need some advice, thank you so much!!!!
I have a 23month old daughter who, I’m afraid is a HORRID sleeper. I have to rock or cuddle her to sleep for naps & bedtime or she won’t go to sleep, no matter how tired she is. I’m not a “cry it out” mom, but we have tried to put her down in her bed when we know she’s tired & she literally cried for more than an hour. I couldn’t stand it anymore & went & got her. (Yes, I checked in on her every 15-25 minutes). I don’t know what to do. Any advice on ways to get her to sleep in her own bed (& go down in her own bed) would be awesome. Oh, & I have a horrible back & the bedrooms are upstairs, carrying a limp toddler to her bed is getting too heavy! Mother at her wits end over here.
I need to write a post on big kids because that’s what this is – a big kid problem. She’s almost 2. You’re options are to wait until she’s 3/4 and ready to have a conversation about things. At that point you could get into more “big kid” behavioral modification stuff a la reward charts and things. But I don’t recommend you do that.
Because when you have a 2-3 year old I no longer see this as a “cry it out” issue – it’s a limit setting issue. What are the bedtime rules? Who sets the bedtime rules? Right now she does (I’m not trying to be mean or unsympathetic but this is really what is happening, right?). She’s basically going to bed when she’s too physically exhausted to stay awake then you carry her to bed aggravating your back. This also sets you up for multiple night wakings because she’s falling asleep in one place and waking up in another.
So yes this deserves it’s own post and I’m not fully giving you a great plan right here (sorry I have a cranky 3 YO on my lap). But the bottom line is that you should be setting bedtime. And the bedtime rule is that she stay in bed. Give her some options – use your words. “Honey if you can’t sleep you can play with teddy, sing songs, count your toes, etc.” Mommy loves you, I’ll see you in the morning.
Also her bedtime (when she falls asleep in exhaustion right?) is probably way too late. I would start a bedtime routine where she goes awake IN her bed somewhere close to when she’s ACTUALLY falling asleep now. Get comfortable with the new way (ie Mom in charge vs. toddler in charge). Then begin gradually moving her bedtime up in small increments.
I hope this is helpful. And I hope you seriously consider what I’m suggesting. This is a pretty key thing that is fundamental to her health as well as your own. It’s also I believe an important thing in your parenting – to feel confident and empowered and in charge.
Alexis recently posted..5 Things I Learned from Doing Sleep Consults
Hi Alexis,
Great website, great information!!! I would like your opinion… First, let me tell you that I don’t think I’m sleep deprived…. My son is almost 6 months although he is not sleeping through the night, he gets a good night sleep. I start the routine with a bath, pj at around 5:45pm… by 6:30pm he is having his bottle (6oz of formula) he falls half asleep, I put him in his crib, sometimes he fuzzes for 30 seconds I pat him a little and that’s it. I don’t hear a peep until 11 or 12… again 6oz, and in 15 minutes he is back to sleep… until 4 to 5 when he gets another 6oz, and usually I need to walk him for 5 to 10 minutes and he sleeps for one or two more hours. I am debating whether or not I need to put him awake in his crib so he can soothe himself… he’s always been a good sleeper and never has waken up in the middle of the night unless for a feeding… This is totally working for me, but I wonder if I’m doing wrong by not letting him fall asleep by himself… what could be the consequences later on? I will really appreciate your input…. thank you…. Sandra
Hi. I have a 6 week old boy and the witching hour literally started a couple of nights ago between 5pm-10pm (roughly).
He already has a healthy appetite (eating around 40oz per day!) – mostly because he only goes 2-3 hours before wanting more food.
As I am worried of overfeeding (yes I know you supposedly cannot overfeed a baby but I still worry as he put on 2lb in 2 weeks).. I wandered if during the witching hour I should “cluster feed” to see if this perhaps makes him sleep longer after the witching hour?
Currently I try to hold off as long as I can before shoving a bottle in his gob but it is hard when so miserable during this evening period each day. I rock/play/walk etc for as long as I can.
Any advice appreciated. Main goal is to have him stretch out his feeds so he is not eating so often but I have no clue how to do this
He already has 4-5oz each feed so can not offer more (he hasn’t wanted more anyway so far). This would mean longer sleep periods during the night too hopefully?
Thanks!
p.s he is a formula fed baby
I have a 4 month old who is completely unpredictable. Falls asleep anytime and wakes up any time. He almost always naps 1.5 hours after waking for 45-90 minutes but it is never the same time and really depends when he wakes. I am a stay at home mom so we do have a pretty steady daily schedule. Any tips for getting some consistency?
I know you are extremely in demand but I really need your help. I feel that I am at a emotional precipice. My lack of sleep because of my daughters sleep issues at night is affecting my marriage and me to such a point that I am losing hope for my life ever being remotely close to normal again.
After reading your chart I am unsure of what to do. My 5mo little girl is napping well, twice a day. She naps about 2 hrs each time, sometimes longer. Should I be waking her up? I am worried that this sleep is interfering with her night sleep. But due to her being only able to be up for about 2hrs after she awakens from a nap I come to a point in the day after her second nap where I either let her nap at 6pm (this would be the 2 hour mark from her previous nap, where she is getting tired again) or try to keep her awake. This usually means I start her bedtime routine and she is in bed by 7pm.
I have learnt from my sisters mistake and from the beginning have been working towards putting her down awake (or at least semi awake). I never rocked her all the way to sleep. Her first 12 hour night at 15wks was her last. The next night and each subsequent night was filled with wakeups. She now is waking up at (approx) 10pm 2am and 4am with her wakeup for the day @730ish. I usually feed her at the 4am wakeup and the other two are a tossup as to how i soothe her, either a feed at 10pm or just a soothe with her soother butt taps and a bit of rocking then I put her back down and gently hold her arms on top of her swaddle. I also use a cool mist humidifier for white noise. I have tried to let her cry is out for a bit to see if she puts herself back to sleep but this is a tossup.
I dont know how to proceed, whether I jump into cio or whether I just jump off a cliff.
thanks
Tried to seperate her last feed from her bedtime so I fed, then bathed and lotioned then bed. She went down easy enough at 8pm and was up at 10, 11, 1230 and 445 (this is when I fed her). I tried to let her cry a bit to see if she would put herself back to sleep but I ended up having to get up and soothe her by picking her up and rocking her for about 3-5mins then putting her down and gently holding her arms on top of her swaddle.
Hi there,
My daughter is 3.5 months old and is waking on average 6-8 times per night. She naps 3-4 times during the day but never more than 45 mins and quite often as short as 15-25 mins.
We have a bedtime routine that includes bath, saying goodnight to the house, stories and boob. Bedtime is falling between 8-9 pm…this has moved from 11-1130 in the past few weeks.
I am feeding on demand and she is solely breastfed (she won’t take a bottle, nor a pacifier).
We had a rough start as we did not discover a tongue tie until she was 2 months. Therefore the first 2 months were very difficult as she was constantly hungry and as such she couldn’t settle and sleep was challenging (even more so than now).
Any advice to help us reduce the number of night time wakings?
Many thanks!
Jordan
Hi,
My son is almost 7 weeks old. In the past 2-3 weeks, he’s started falling into a night time sleeping pattern. The only problem is that he takes his last bottle too early…anywhere between 4-5pm, and then wants to go right to sleep. This means that his longest sleep stretch starts at 6pm and leaves him waking up 2-3 times per night. I’d prefer if I could push this back 1-2 hours so his “last” bottle isn’t so early in the evening. Am I wrong for wanting to push it back? 4pm just seems so early! And when I go back to work, this won’t jive with daycare since he’ll be there until 6 or 7pm at night.
My little one is 7 weeks old an hid sleep patterns are very irregular. Ours like sometimes he sleeps a lot an sometimes he don’t and the opposite. It worried me more when he’s sees more. Out is something i should worry over?
My little lady. Is 2 weeks today and she will not sleep in anything at night. Only on my chest or my hubby’s chest..it’s really hard as I know it’s not the safest way to sleep. But we have tried the rock & play, car seat, her mamaroo, it’s called the snuggle nest. The nap nanny & nothing.. Do you recommend anything that they like to sleep in at night. She will however sleep in all of these during the day.. I’m just at a losss & need some help.
Thank you!
Hi!
I have a 5.5 month old and she currently sleeps A LOT. By a lot I mean, two 2-3 hour naps, and one 1 hour nap? Sometimes she will even take a 4 hour nap. People say I’m lucky but she only sleeps through the night (11 hours) every once in awhile. She lately (not including the growth spurt she is in right now which is making her wake up every 4 hours to eat) has been waking up after 7 hours at night and wanting to eat. I thought by this age she should be able to sleep longer than that without eating. I am correct with this? She typically goes back to bed pretty quickly and then I wake her up at 6 for daycare or she may get up on her own around 5:30. This is her schedule as of now:
Up at 5:45 or 6 am (we work early)
Asleep at daycare by 7:30 and sleeps for 2-3 hours
Takes another 2 hour nap or more in the afternoon and up by 2:45
Sleepy 2 hours later and have to put her down for another nap for another hour around 4:30 or 4:45 (sometimes I have to wake her up)
Asleep by 6:45
Wake up around 2 or so to nurse
Is she sleeping too much? Is this why she’s waking up around 2? Sometimes she wakes up earlier (around 1) and she’s becoming a little bit more difficult to put back down (takes about 10 minutes to get her back down)
What age should she be sleeping less than 17 hours a day?
I have heard not to wake a sleeping baby but I get scared that she is sleeping too much during the day. I’m also wondering when she can stay up past the 2 hour mark without getting overtired! She rubs her eyes even before she’s been up 2 hours. Let me know what you think!
Alexis,
We have a daughter who turns 6 months old tomorrow. She has been enrolled at a Development Center (daycare) for about three months now. When she first started there, she would take a few naps throughout the day, anywhere between 30-60 minutes in length, occasionally longer. She has a white noise machine and a sleep sac that we had her teachers use to swaddle her arms. Over the past month though, she began to roll over so her teachers would no longer swaddle her arms. This has led to her naps being almost non-existent. Over the course of an 8 hour day at the center, she has had recent days with as little as 20 minutes sleep the whole day. When we pick her up, she immediately goes to sleep in the car and then sleeps for a good 3 hours when she gets home. Her teachers are working with us, but she just isn’t sleeping and we’re pretty sure it has to do with the swaddling. When we bring her home, we do swaddle her arms, but we have a video monitor that we have on to keep an eye on her. When swaddled, she naps great. She sleeps great through the night, without having her arms swaddled, which we think is due to her being tired and not having anything to look at because her room is dark. We’re somewhat concerned about her sleep at daycare because on the weekends, she takes about three naps per day (morning, afternoon, and early evening), but she just isn’t getting that sleep during the day on weekdays. Do you have any thoughts you can share with us?
Jason
Hi Jason,
It might be worth looking at this post – http://www.troublesometots.com/dr-karp-part-2-swaddling-babies/
I think Alexis recommends strapping them into a fully reclined swing swaddled so that they can’t flip (you have to watch the video for that bit).
Also, it might be worth looking at the Zipadee zip http://zipadeezip.com/ or the Merlin sleep suit? http://www.magicsleepsuit.com/
We use a Zippy and I have NO idea why it works, but it does so I’m not complaining!!
Sounds like she is a great sleeper over all – she should come and have a chat with my baby
Lisa
Hi Jason,
I just posted but it didn’t seem to come up…
Have you read this post? http://www.troublesometots.com/dr-karp-part-2-swaddling-babies/
If you watch the video then I think Alexis recommends strapping baby in swaddled into fully reclined swing so she cannot flip over.
Also, you could have a look at the Zipadee Zip or Merlin Magic Sleepsuit (if you google them). We have the Zippy and I have no idea why it works but it does for my swaddle lover!!
Congrats on what sounds like a great sleeper overall, she can have a chat with my son
Lisa
Help! My 5week old has such trouble sleeping, he has not slept well since birth (usual average 8 – 10 hours in 24) We have tried everything, rocking, different beds, different rooms, routines, swaddling, pacifier, sleeping with us, on us, without us…
He sleeps reasonably at night ( 2- 3 hrs between feeds) but takes a long time to settle and is noisy and rarely sems to get to deep, relaxed sleep.
During the day he doesn’t sleep much, likes to be on his own looking at the ceiling and enjoys a bath and change mat… but then he cries when moved. We are not over stimulating him i don’t think – he doesn’t have toys, he has a bit of ‘me time’ until he shows signs of tiredness which is often then into bed where he screams or lies awake, or sleeps for 10 mins only.
The car seat works whilst moving then he’s awake, the sling often works, again only when moving.
I know he is over tired, he has little bags under his tiny eyes and his sleep is so noisy and disturbed i don’t sleep at all…
What can i do to help him?
Rach, sorry you’re having a rough time! Just thought I’d comment to give you some encouragement to stick with it. Just because swaddling/white noise/swing/etc didn’t work instantly doesn’t mean it won’t help! Babies that age don’t know what the heck is going on so they’re relying on you to set the routines and help them fall asleep. Decide what soothing/sleep aids you’re going to use and be super consistent. An overtired baby is going to take a bit longer to get on board but I think with consistency you’ll see improvement. And I’m guessing Alexis would call ‘motion junkie’ on your babe and tell you to get a swing ASAP! Best of luck!